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Meow.
Meow. |
A year of firsts and lasts and mosh pits (umm, duhh). Give me a chance to reminisce a little, 'kay? (No worries dear, no name dropping (; ) January: Oh happy day, I feel like I've been delivered from hell. Because I'm pretty sure that's where I was before. Did I have any friends at this new place? Fat chance, but give it time. End Result: A bit depressed and veryyy broken. February: Height of performances. Only one that made much of a difference though. So everyone else bailed, I dealt with it. Billy Joel's Vienna is still up there in my favorite songs. Wow. Umm, okay, other than that talk about connections made. Like, my major support structure was the one person who everyone else hated. And when i say hated, it was one of those fiery burning passion things. I'll never forget that guy. March: A steadily boring month. Though I remember going to go see Horten hears a who (people just LOVE it when i pick the movie (: ), There wasn't much else to be remembered. Yay. April: Concert #1 of 2008: Boys like Girls and Avril (haha, lmao) Started my Obsession with Martin Johnson, hahaha. Didn't take long for that one to fade, but I did write some funny little rhyme in my planner: "So peaceful Without her. But no one could doubt her. She took all attention, While others took direction. Falling faster in recession. nearing closer to depression" ...no wonder i can't remember much before camp...jeezum. May: Funny chorus class that was. The teacher fuming and making everyone but me write a freakin' one page essay (and bailing people out of writing it) So, during select I just happened to look over at his desk and read something a "friend" had written, and that was it. As if it didn't piss me off before, but the fact that her writing was so aimed at me? Really irritating. Don't even talk to me about that. It's not my fault. And another week, I decided to execute my plan to try to get a detention... worked after like 5 days, but still. And that detention, what was said could have made me cry. I won't get into it, but it wasn't like a sad thing, kind of like overly happy. Wow, what a month. June: bahaha, Oh my gosh the "Honors dinner". I can't even begin to tell you how stupid and boring that was. But heck, I guess it made some memories..and really fun to laugh at during lunch in the band room with my lab partner, ahaha, good times. And? Chorus concert! It wasn't too bad. Solo? Yeah, and i'll reference this fact at a later entry. And the Boston pops, definitely can't forget that. Where my, in theory, best friend admitted favoritism (obvious). And more life lessons on the bus ride home... and more crying. (What the heck? seriously, what came over me that year...) And the dance (ehh, it wasn't THAT bad) and graduation. One of those, why don't you just shoot me now moments. Eight awards? Come ON! I didn't do THAT much worth remembering. Well, apparently there was something worth remembering. (Took me long enough to realize that..idiot) The end school, hello summer! July: Here come the life changing part (super duper exciting, yes? yes.) Not to mention the stuff I actually remember. Well first thing's first: Camp. It wasn't actually "camp" that changed me, it was the stuff taught and the weird, almost slap in the face break through. My outlook on life changed tremendously. That was when TWLOHA had an even better meaning to me (Yeah, you best be reading the story before you judge dear) And I got connected with people. Not just anyone, but people who've proved to be really important figures in my life. After that, I was almost a blithering mess, but regrouping didn't take much. Two words: WARPED TOUR Finally, a place we can "fit in" and giving everyone a chance seems a lot more promising. Motionless in White? you bet. Mayday Parade=Highlight of my life Then the down pour! Oh, jeez i love dancing in the rain. That felt so good. August: First time on a plane by myself: down to Philly Paramore concert!! Haha, that was cool. And I believe storyland was in that month. The month when I started getting requests on facebook from people I had never seen in my entire life that were going to Central with me. Weirdos. (haha, just kidding...mostly) There was one girl in particular that I found out I had literally most of my classes with. Funny how this stuff happens. Then, the others? well, wait till november. September: Freshman orientation: worst. experience. ever. Haha, i swear I wanted to cry my schedule was soooo screwed up. But, by the time the first day rolled around, it wasn't all bad. Way to not get lost! :)! Dipping my toes in, realizing that I hate Civics... It was great. October: Concert Month!: Rocktoberfest and COBRA STARSHIP! cheyeahh. That was the month I kinda ditched my planner...yeah. And aside from the concerts...I didn't have much fun...like at all. So I picked up the guitar again and found a new passion for it. Horray clauses!! November: Oh my. Gotta love the baritone in the chorus who knows wayyyy too much about what you've done. Claiming I've got "potential," he apparently believes in me. And it kinda scares me when he knows what i've done. Queer, haha, but i really do love that kid. I'll have to thank him someday. Merrow Vista? Oh jeez, this'll be a long one. For one, I finally figured out who the facebook requests were from (I guess he's not THAT creepy, haha) Then, there was the girl that was always there, We just never talked. Well, I'd say she's pretty swell. She makes awkward things more fun than their supposed to be. Thus, I love awkward things even more (: Then there was the never serious chick that loved going up to people in the freezing weather and just touch their but till they noticed. Sigh, she's the greatest, hahaha. Sure! the council circle was...pretty...uhm, cultish? haha, yeah. But as far as the experience goes, damn it was great. Okay, Birthday? Fact that people remembered it was pretty cool. I mean, I felt loved (: But it wasn't that exciting till the Merrow vista reunion. Inside jokes much? The bulge, haha wow. Though I probably wouldn't admit it then, I really missed it. December: Funny how all the firsts happen really close to the end of the year. I wouldn't say it was the very first time, , but I don't normally go that, uhm deep with people? Yeah, let's leave it at deep. Maybe very deep. Haha, that's probably a better way to describe it. Stupid ice storm boredom. So, since switching lunch tables in November maybe? I met some pretty cool people. Like legit, these people are so great XD. Yes, the same people who randomly told me to not never have kids... I love them (: Then you had the music department concerts. I got yelled at for not trying out AGAIN (jeez, that kid's serious). I met a really queer creeper kid ... oh well, I guess he wont be like that forever... I hope, poor thing. After that, my supidity almost rolled me down the friendship losing hill. I didn't like that place, made me feel all sick. And shortly after, here I am. Writing my highly summarized life out in my stupid blog for the world to see. I'm trying to decide if i'm writing this to me, or as a thankyou to others. I'm probably going to set it on the thankyou, because you people have touched my live. Gasp! deal with it, there wasn't exactly much you could do to stop it (: Goals for Oh Nine: 1)-Uhm, drive? cheyeah. 2)-Find another first 3)-Make more memories ...So i was going to end this with some cheesy inspirational song right? But truth be told, I can't stand most of them, haha Greenday? ehh, they're bearable How about we are the champions? Queen? not sure that describes the year too well. Screamo? Come on, it wasn't that kind of year. So hows about you open your eyes to motion city soundtrack's perfect teeth? That's a pretty good representation.. I'd put the perfect one up... But i'm too lazy to record any of my songs (: Peace out 2008, In the end, You'll be missed.
Oh well, you'll survive. So, I splurged a little today with my itunes card and bought none other than (brace yourself) ...the new All American Rejects album. I know, I can't believe it either. But it's really pretty good. And what's weird, it reminds me of part of the year. What's even more strange, You, Me, and Everyone We Know had a new ep out that kinda represented the rest of the year. Queer? very. And then, of course, Motion City Soundtrack never seems to fail at getting at least one song in my end of the year mix. And what a weird end of the year this has been. As if I wasn't happy enough to get out of Hillside, I had the best summer and the most exciting following school year. guess we'll be righting about that tomorrow But seriously, the all american rejects are pretty swell!
No dear, not literal boxes (You should know better) But theoretical ones. If by force I must do something with no motivation from myself guess what? Most of the time I won't do it whole heartedly. isn't that great !? I think it's just grand. ...But on the bright side! My life is boring!! Oh wait, that's not good... umm to end on a forced positve note.... ... ... ...ugh, i give up.
and i'm thinking, why the heck is everyone staring at me? nothing out of the ordinary was wrong. Just me. Someone want to tell me why?
spying on forever" -Fighting With Wire So let's say i gave up on this. What would happen? Let's see, I'd probably be quite depressed. Unhappy and bored. Do I want to be like that? No. That's why I refuse to take you seriously.
That means New Years is pretty freakin' close. That means the old new year's resolutions. You can tell people give up because the amount of runners dies down by February. Although some queer person in science pretty much called me fat (gonna kill that kid), my goal is definetly not to lose weight. It's also not to become a better person. Nor is it to become kick-ass at guitar. Is it too find love? pshh, no way. Call me lazy, but I really don't want to do anything like that. So what is my goal? Try this one: live. Why simply live? What a lovely question. Last year I had a similar goal and I acctually had fun. I really don't care what people think anymore. Judge how you will. Again, I could care less.
And since giving up on trying to please people, it's harder. For example: If someone asks you a question, you should answer it honestly, am i right? What if the answer isn't what that person wants to hear? Well then you've got a nice little fued caused by the truth. So then what? Lie? Well, I don't really have the guts half the time to lie. Pathetic? Maybe, but i never thought the truth could hurt anyone. Sure, the truth is hard to hear sometimes, but it's the truth. I'm the type that thinks global warming is bs because i've found facts. Why? Because when people tell me lies, I don't think they have the confidence to face what's really, truely happening.
Could there really be something there that's that appealing? To cause the words to flow from your lips? My answer?: Obviously not; but apparently I'm wrong. "Let gaze into your mind and you can look into mine"
-sick puppies I really like the raw sound of the bass. Full of angst and really disgusting alone. Pair it up with some show offs, and it bring everything together. Maybe that's why i like the bass.
doesn't reach that far" -A. Green It's nice to recive a text or call from someone you haven't talked to in a while. Someone you really care about that you've just lost touch with Someone you've been dying to reach. It just kind of shows that in the end, the person who you'd think wouldn't care for you does. no school tomorrow. no civics. yes blog :D.
So how am i supposed to do my projects? Oh right, I can't. So i suppose my day will be devoted to homework and hoping my friends don't turn into freeze pops. Aww crap =/.
 Power outages suck. Flooded basements are pretty much just as bad. But no heat? That's probably the worst. I was insanly bored today. No school, no internet, and no coffee. So you'd figure a couple random phone calls would keep you entertained for a bit. Social interaction is a beautiful thing. It's my favorite (:
 People are funny. I was talking to someone the other day about how i don't really want to have kids. This person starts going off on how I have to pass on my genes on to the next generation so there can be more people in the world that are interresting to talk to... random? yeah. surprising? most def. Those are my friends for you... I wouldn't trade 'em for the world.  Senses Fail - Calling All Cars
and it's taped to the mirror so you can ...see all right. "Christmas is coming" "Cool, I hate Christmas" The brain's a funny thing. A big mass of grey matter. Dull as anything else. And yet, in that blob of matter, there's everything. I mean, everything. All those cute little songs you wrote, every thought you'd ever though, and everything you're not fully conscious of. 15 years, and I still cannot figure out how it works. |
