welcome.
Meow.
Meow. |
Jr. Kids today made me want to vomit. Three hour nap? That was just ridiculous. Homework? World History critique, map, and science. Really, not that difficult, I'll still be up late. Because my mind wanders often. Too often. I kinda wish I cared more about school...but I don't. I just want to sleep right now. I want a break. Church seems slightly odd now. I don't know, I talk to more people but I only get to sit in service 50% of the time. "They preached a sermon you would have liked today." -Cool. I want a break. Today wasn't all bad...it was just the fact that at the end of the break, I'm less rested than when I started. Connecticut proves to give no sleep. I was really cold :/. But it was an okay trip overall. Fatigue+allergies=more lack of focus. I think it's kinda funny how I dislike a lot of people, but would rather be with them than in some random state alone. Like you. You bother me a lot sometimes, but I could never hate you. I think it's just your nature. Last Sunday was kinda fun too. Funny how you'll actually talk to me now though. Silly people. So now, I guess I'm just going to push through this silly week. So that Wednesday can be stressful. So that Thursday I'll be up writing a paper and babysiting. So that Friday I won't do anything. So that Saturday I can wake up early for training. So that maybe, just maybe, I can find a break. I don't think I want a break. I need a break. "And I will long to hold you in my arms." -City and Colourx3
It's silly...I shouldn't. But I do. I do a lot. It's ridiculous. We're ridiculous. I miss summer break. I need to finish that world history book. And write that paper. Late night tomorrow? I'm sure. But I miss you. I can't focus on anything. It's awful. It's terrible. Connecticut was fine. Not terrible...not amazing. Just fine. I got some Christmas shopping done. I'm pleased with it...might cause some spaces to be filled. This week has felt empty. I saw family. I got a nice report card. I'm probably the luckiest person in the world right now. But I feel empty. It's silly. I miss you. I'm too far gone, aren't I? That's just pathetic.
Little homework. Lots of nothing. A few naps. No report cards. Weekend in sight. Not too awful I'd say.
So now I might actually have a B in science? An an A in World History? Gahh...I need to focus on other things I do believe. This will be the death of me. :p There are a lot of good things to focus on this week. Quite a few...sure some enter my mind more often than others. But still, all very good. Some more perfect, sure. I'll let my mind wander on that for awhile tonight.
Pointless day? Mmhm. Productive? For planning maybe. Tomorrow will be nice :)
You should stop. Now.
I'll also easily admit that I've enjoyed the patterns you've traced on mine too. It's also quite simple to admit that just sitting with you is my favorite things to do. It's safe to admit that I think about us too much, and that you make me much too happy. It's nice to admit that you're comforting and calm me down. I love to just sit and be quiet with you." -We're silly. So so so silly. As in Music Theory and Chorus Almost As in World History and Math B+ in English B in French Probable C+ in Science. Okay, that last test went really well...and she loved my song. But she can't grade my song? High grades on both would cure my worries. But of course, that would never really happen. I need a walk. Badly. The five minutes last night was really nice :) Thanks.
My report card looks so pretty...aside from that little fluke. That silly science teacher. I've finally mastered my English enough. World History's under control. French is evening out. Music is...music. Math has been permanently owned. It's science. Input does not equal output. I fear getting stuff back...Stupid reasons for points off. Like...if I used one vocab word? A. Only if I did that review sheet would I have passed that quiz. I'm going to try a polite approach to talking to her about it outside of class. Perhaps it won't help...but maybe she'll like me a little more. Wadleigh did. Stupid 'writing conferences' Maybe it wont be enough to save me this quarter. But maybe next quarter will be better...so I don't have that 50 in there. Without that, I'd be fine. It'd be nice to have never gotten it though. I got a 59 in English, and it barely nicked my grade. Why can't science be like English? "Once you start feeling the accomplishment it doesn't go away." Six tests tomorrow. All subjects...aside from music theory of course. But today's Wednesday. I like Wednesdays. Good things have happened today. I mean hey, I learned a new Italian piano song, and I can play no such thing on guitar. And then there's cell tonight. Always proves to be interesting. Lots of make-up. Lots of studying. Today is a good day. "Yes?" "I love you." "I love you too."
I hate when she just rocks in that thing. My head hurts. I could leave yes, but why should I? It's the family room after all :p.
Everything would be fine aside from bio. Hate. Bio. Awful. I so so so hate her class...oh well... Yesterday was beyond amazing though :) Kinda like the week before it....and a couple weeks before that. Tracing pretty patterns with fingers over hands. Simple. Pathetic looking. But so amazing. The new gesture was...unexpected. Very cute...very unexpected. Sigh...ridiculous.
Which is nice. Very nice... Now I get to do all that lovely make-up work! Great. It's not like it's that much in reality. Just...boring. I still don't really like most of my classes. I'm boreddddd. I know that I shouldn't say I'm bored, because I know what happened last time, but I'm bored with school. I'm finding it very difficult to care about. I'm probably just not "focused" enough...no. I know I'm not focused enough. I know I have other things on my mind...maybe that should be singular though. Oh well. Someday maybe I'll care again. I knew I hated school...but I never knew I'd be in a place like this. A ridiculous place like this. A pathetic place like this. I don't understand it in the least...I kinda wish I did though. It seems almost too perfect...not like I could complain about it at all. I just don't understand why...why me? Mm, maybe I should just be happy and hush.
Sick...thanks dad. I suppose eight planes over five days would do it to you. I really dislike being sick :P. The house chokes me usually... No cell for me tonight. Nothing for a little while now.
Why? Good morning sickness. No, not 'morning sickness.' That would be impossible thank you :p. Anyways, I feel like coughing up my lungs. And I feel like my head's going to explode. And I have lots of little thinks to do today. Like? Well: -Send World History notes -Finish World History song (Yeah...it's intense.) -Finish Science song (Yeah, I know. Pathetic.) Cool. I really don't want to be sick. I just want to make it to Wednesday...is that too much to ask? I'll be a praying person for a bit. I refuse to stay in the bleh state. I'm too happy to be in a bleh state anyhow :)
So I won't. "Remember that one time at the boat house?" "How can I not remember that one time at the boat house?" |
